Bill had to lower the window in his car. In fact, he had to lower both windows. Bernard had a horrific aroma. Bill thought he would probably gag if he didn’t get some fresh air. "Bernard do you ever bathe" said Bill. "Yes I do" Bernard responded," at least twice a year". "That’s disgusting", Bill blurted out. The both looked at each other for a moment and broke out into uncontrollable laughter. Bill couldn’t stay upset with Bernard very long. Bernard told Bill that he was feeling a little cold and preferred that Bill shut the windows. Bill looked at him and said that he would not shut the window. He would break anyone’s arm that tried to. Bernard turned around in his seat, facing straight ahead, and proceeded to change Bill’s radio setting from lite jazz to acid rock. Bill usually listened to lite jazz or classical music. He thought just for a few more miles and he’d be through with him for another week. Bill was cruising along at 45 miles, when out of the corner of his eye. He saw Bernard pull out a cigarette. "Not in my car!" Bill said boldly. "It won’t hurt anything", Bernard replied smugly. Bill lunged for the cigarette just as Bernard tried to light it. Bill was really quick. He secured the cigarette in his right hand, crumbled it, and threw it out of the window in one motion. Then he started to lecture Bernard about second hand smoke and lung cancer. Bernard kept his eyes straight ahead. "Are you listening to me?" Bill asked while trying to make eye contact with his wayward cousin. "Watchout!" cried out Bernard. Bill had taken hi8s eyes off of the road and when he turned back to the road he was only a few feet from a large garbage truck parked over the middle of the fog line. Normally, this would not be a problem because his jag was equipped with anti-lock brakes. But this time there was a problem. Bill was still going 45 mph and the truck was at a dead stop. But bill was extremely quick and he turned the wheel hard right. He missed the truck. But he was headed straight for a power pole. H couldn’t turn left because that would put him back into oncoming traffic. Again he made a hard right. Slam! He hit a pole and spun 360 degrees into a chainlink fence. Eventually colliding with a concrete porch stairwell.

Bill was not hurt, but that couldn’t be said for Bernard. He hadn’t been wearing his seatbelt and he had a bruise on the right side of his forehead, which had collided with the passengerside window. Bernard was able to get out of the car first. Bill was not able to get his door open. Bernard came over and tugged at the door. But to no avail. Bill decided to get out on the passenger side. When he got out of the car he looked at the damage. It was pretty bad, but the insurance would pay for it. Nobody was hurt badly. He was lucky he didn’t kill anybody. He was about to ask Bernard about his injury when he felt a crushing blow to the back of his neck and shoulders. His knees felt week. Then everything went black.

When Bill came to, he was on an ambulance gurney. He saw a fat faced young paramedic attending to him. He asked him where Bernard was. The paramedic indicated that Bernard was arrested for assault. Bill couldn’t understand why Bernard was arrested for possibly fending off his attacker. The paramedic indicated that Bernard had actually broken the other guy’s neck. "They don’t think that the other guy will make it", the paramedic said. The paramedic also told Bill that his injury did not seem that serious, but he would have to take Bill to St. Joseph’s Hospital for observation. Bill was hit with a large board, possibly a 2 by 4, which had numerous rusty nails protruding from it. Surprisingly, Bill had very little blood loss, which the paramedic found peculiar. The wounds seem to have naturally cauterized.